REAL TALK: BEACHES SUCK
Sand gets everywhere and the sun is trying to kill you the entire time. Why would you ever name a drink about copulating in such a terrible place? You know what's better? A Scottish loch. No sand. Minimal sun (hell yeah, Scotland). Beautiful vistas. It's a no brainer. Show your support for this revolutionary idea by throwing on these teal shades with black lenses and a graphic of the most famous loch resident out there. And next time someone asks you about a romantic walk on the beach, tell them you prefer your sex on the loch.
